Rants Go Here!

Ahhh... I think I'm starting to see the problem....

Can't you scan the bar codes on the CDs?

If they have one.

NoCoPilot wrote:

Packaging.

I'm with you on this. How many times have I sent potato chips sailing across the kitchen when the bag gave way - leaving the adhesive intact.

Just had to resort to the scissors to open a plastic bag containing a small filter. What a pain in the ass.

You would think someone would invent an adhesive which is secure yet easy to open. Ah, hell, I'm sure they have one but it costs eight cents a ton more than the crap they use.

Why is bar soap shrinkwrapped?

Candies that have three layers of wrapping. Why! Mamba, Now or Laters, Starburst. Why all the damn wrapping?!

People who talk loudly in restaurants. I'm not really interested in participating in your conversation, even as an observer.

NoCoPilot wrote:

People who talk loudly in restaurants. I'm not really interested in participating in your conversation, even as an observer.

Or talk loudly on the phone pretty much anywhere. Totally obnoxious.

People who order simple dishes at a restaurant.

A few years ago a good friend of mine from out of state was visiting, and I took him to our best excellent fancy restaurant to welcome him.

He ordered meatloaf.

Meatloaf!

When I go out, I like to order something too exotic or too time-consuming to prepare myself. I'm a fairly-decent cook, and I've been known to put on some pretty dang wonderful meals. But I would NEVER consider ordering meatloaf at a restaurant.

Or pancakes. Or a baked potato.

Did your friend enjoy his meal? Seems to me that is all that matters. And I really don't like meatloaf.


I don't believe I've ever been to an "excellent fancy restaurant" that served meatloaf.

Perhaps I should post a rant about people who are overly concerned about other people's tastes.

_Howard wrote:

I don't believe I've ever been to an "excellent fancy restaurant" that served meatloaf.

Me either.  Surprised me.  I didn't know they had meatloaf.

He said it was good -- but it didn't look like anything special to me.  You'd like my meatloaf, guaranteed.  I make a mean meatloaf.

Manufactured celebrity.

I'm slowly working my way through Morgan Spurlock's TV series "Inside Man," where he does a job for a week to show how hard it is.  The episode I watched on the elliptical this morning Morgan tried his hand at being a paparazzo, shooting celebrities for money.  One of the questions he had, for a couple of well-known paparazzi who were helping him, is "how do you know where to find celebrities?"

"Well," one of them admitted sheepishly, "sometimes they tell you themselves."

"What???"

"Yes, some celebrities who are in the tabloids all the time tip off the paparazzi themselves to tell them where they'll be."

Morgan looks shocked.  "Why would they do that?"

"For a percentage."  There are certain "celebrities" who don't act, they don't sing, they don't dance -- they're basically famous for being famous.  Their job is to get themselves publicity every week so it APPEARS they are a celebrity, and get endorsement contracts and advertising deals out of that.  They essentially pay the photographers to maintain this fiction.

When the paparazzi sell photos of them, the Kardashians and Hiltons get a percentage.

"Contents may have settled during shipping."

I don't buy it.  Manufacturers use this excuse to short-ship the consumer.  I just opened a new can of instant cocoa, and it was less than half full.

The instant apple cider I buy comes 8 envelopes to a box.  I usually open three boxes and put all 24 envelopes in one box.  They easily fit.

Why not make the containers fit the contents?  It's gotta be cheaper to ship and store appropriate-sized containers.

The containers fit the contents during the filling process.

Bullfuckingshit.

Cornflakes may settle during transit.  Instant cocoa powder wouldn't.

I used the term "short ship"which I shouldn't have. The container probably has the full net weight listed. Just the container could be half the size.

When powdered products are blown into the containers, there is a lot of air in it. The products are not compressed during packing, so as not to trap any moisture. What air remains on top of the product is typically replaced by nitrogen to retain freshness.
No bullfucking shit at all. Just air.

_Howard wrote:

No bullfucking shit at all. Just air.

Can I borrow this as a sigfile?

No bullfucking shit at all. Just air.^TM

Oh crap, you TRADEMARKED it?? Does that mean I should expect a call from your lawyer?

Or is that "lawyers"? Maybe you have retained a whole law firm to protect your intellectual property.

Hey, what kind of property taxes are there on intellectual property? Do they go up if you put a house on them?

Flat bottomed sinks.

I appreciate that our new porcelain sink holds a pan nice and flat, but a better design, it seems to me, would have been to add a slight cant to the bottom so water and food particles and stuff head for the drain when washing dishes.  Instead, everything just sits there.

You have to sweep it toward the drain.

Nobody knows the tribulations I have to deal with every day.  It is a struggle, let me tell you.

Yes, a difficult life indeed.

Actually, a flat-bottom sink will drain water just fine. What causes the problem is the other matter in the sink. Water can't pile up when there is a drain at the same level as the bottom of the sink.

Yes, your post brings up another pet peeve of mine, recipes.

Specifically, recipes that call for a cup of water -- but don't tell you if that's a level cup or a heaping cup.

But in that case, you definitely want a heaping cup.

Muffin top? Under boob?