Movie: Earthstorm

Channel surfing last night I ended up watching this 2006 made-for-TV movie. The science in it had me howling out loud. The errors in it were not just minor details either, like jet engine noises as they flew the Space Shuttle(!) over the moon's surface.

• A really big asteroid hits the dark side of the moon.  Rather than creating a crater, it creates a crack -- like a Grand Canyon that spans the entire hemisphere.  Scientists can somehow see (and measure) this, even though it's on the side of the moon that faces away from Earth.
  
• Scientists fear the crack is widening, and 1/4 of the moon's mass will soon break off and hurtle toward Earth(!)
  
• The moon's orbit has also been altered by the impact, causing higher-than-normal tides on Earth and the creation of five simultaneous category 5 hurricanes(!)
  
• In the meantime, smaller pieces of the moon start hurtling to Earth, destroying Mexico City among others.  There is apparently no orbital velocity to these moon chunks -- they fall straight down to Earth, within hours after the asteroid impact(!)
  
• Because of the imminent breakup of the moon, a Space Shuttle(!) is readied within 48 hours(!) to fly to the moon(!) with two nuclear bombs in its cargo bay(!).  These bombs are to be used to collapse the walls of the canyon, thus healing the rift (don't even bother asking!)
  
• At the last minute(!) a demolitions expert (Stephen Baldwin) is added to the shuttle crew (2 people!) to oversee the deployment of the bombs(!)
  
• The Shuttle is fitted with nuclear pulse engines(!) to make it to the moon in, like 20 minutes(!).  There are no g-forces to worry about.
  
• Once at the moon (after dodging debris like a Fokker biplane -- in space(!)) the Shuttle hovers(!) over the moon's surface.  The crew walk around inside the cabin with normal gravity(!)
  
• The cabin of the Space Shuttle was as spacious as the bridge of the Enterprise
  
• The cargo bay of the Space Shuttle was also spacious, although it looked suspiciously like an operating room set
  
• Once at the moon, the crew learns from Houston (instantaneous communication!) that the two nukes (each about the size of SCUBA tank) aren't going to be enough to heal the rift across half the moon (which is still widening)
  
• Scientists at Houston (incidentally the control room contains about 6 people) decide to somehow combine the nukes with the nuclear pulse drive on the shuttle to create a MER (Magnetic something something) which will increase the magnetic field in the moon's iron core and thus pull the pieces of the moon back together(!!)
  
• This reconfiguration is performed by the demolitions expert in about 15 minutes using "spare"(!) wires and circuits from the Shuttle.  The end result looks like a nuke with a detonator attached.
  
• This device is released inside the rift (they never explain how) and it's detonated
  
• The moon heals itself(!)
  
• The moon's orbit corrects itself(!)
  
• Earth's weather returns instantly to normal(!)
  
• The Shuttle crew returns to Earth as heroes
  

It was really really unintentionally funny.

That's a MST3k moment there, bucko. That's when you sit there with the dog and some popcorn and do bad jokes and imitations.