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 Shower Thoughts

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NoCoPilot

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PostSubject: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 7:53 am

“Where are you?” is a question that’s never been asked in sign language.
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NoCoPilot

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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 7:55 am

No-one has ever been in an empty room.
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 7:56 am

When a pregnant woman takes a bath, she’s become a human submarine.
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 7:57 am

The Titanic’s sinking was a true miracle to the lobsters in the kitchens.
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 7:59 am

Outer Space is really just an hour away if my Toyota could go straight up.
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 8:06 am

Gyms should offer a very cheap basic membership, but charge a penalty for every day you don’t show up.
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 8:09 am

When two really famous celebrities meet, do they have to introduce themselves?
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Mon Feb 12, 2018 8:10 am

Necks are basically wrists for our heads.
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Sat Nov 24, 2018 12:59 pm

  • The spiders that live in Buckingham Palace are a whole parallel royal family.

  • The more dismembered animals you have in your freezer, the more socially acceptable it is.

  • Living without insurance is the opposite of the lottery.

  • Mickey Mouse is still the face of Disney -- even though he hasn't done a picture in years.

  • Men spend hours studying the wall behind the toilet. Women study the wall in front of it.

  • When you're happy, you hear the melody. When you're sad you hear the lyrics.

  • If a dog year is equivalent to seven human years, then playing with your dog for an hour is the best day of his life.

  • November is the Thursday of months.

  • Golf is the only sport to see who plays the least.

  • Is it patronizing for your computer to ask you to prove you're not a robot?

  • Setting a wake-up alarm is like putting a time bomb in your dreams.

  • Video games appeal to people without a mission in their lives.


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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Sat Nov 24, 2018 3:05 pm

NoCoPilot wrote:
Golf is the only sport to see who plays the least.

What about bowling?

(But I don't consider either of them to be a sport.)
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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Fri Dec 07, 2018 8:13 am

  • It is human to make a mistake, unless it's in a Captcha to prove you're not a machine

  • No matter how old you are it's fun to hit someone over the head with an empty wrapping paper tube

  • Dreams are like GIFs that lose frames every time you try to remember them

  • "K" in Morse code "-.-" is just as passive-aggressive

  • After a 3-day weekend you feel rested. After a 5-day weekend you forget how to be a productive member of society.

  • Even sounding like an idiot in a second language is better than speaking only one

  • In 60 years it will be ironic when people will look at their iPhones while working

  • The pessimist is either correct or pleasantly surprised -- which is an awful optimistic view of pessimism

  • Exercise is fooling your body into thinking it needs to be stronger to survive

  • Maturity is knowing when to hit 'delete' instead of 'send'

  • There aren't any rap songs about staying home and saving money

  • Anyone who says you can't buy love has never been to a pet store

  • The Bermuda Triangle must be a glitch in The Matrix

  • If you're born around midnight do your feet have a different birthday than your head?

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PostSubject: Re: Shower Thoughts   Fri Dec 07, 2018 8:33 am



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