So I was parking at the Post Office, pulled up alongside a row of cars and began parallel-parking into an open slot.
I got about halfway in when the car behind me -- a brand new Mercedes convertible -- pulled forward and began to leave. However, as I was already halfway into the slot in front of him, he could not pull out directly (without turning his wheel sharper) and I could not continue to back up. So we sat there, me with my brake lights and backup lights on, him glaring at me.
I sat.
He sat.
I sat.
He sat.
I said, "I can wait all day, asshole." He began gesticulating, indicating I should abort my parking job so he could pull out. I assume, from his car, that he's USED to people jumping to his every whim. I said to myself, "No way, dickhead. I was halfway into the parking spot before YOU blocked me. You BACK THE FUCK UP and pull around ME!"
I waited another 30 seconds or so.
He began honking his horn and made more rude hand gestures.
I got out of my car and addressed him. "You're blocking me from parking. Can't you see my backup lights?" He called me some rude names and continued to bounce around behind his steering wheel, slapping his dashboard and spraying his windshield with spit.
I decided the better part of valor etc etc etc, so I pulled forward and let him out. He continued flipping me off as he punched the throttle and burned rubber.
Afterward, I realized I SHOULD have contined to back up until out bumpers touched, then walked back, grabbed his car keys out of his ignition, and thrown them onto a neighboring roof.
But I don't have THAT much testosterone anymore.
Home 
