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 Terrible Puns

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_Howard
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Apr 16, 2015 10:53 am

What's a Fort Worth?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Apr 16, 2015 10:55 am

NoCoPilot wrote:
What do you call the hangman's apprenticeship program?
Hanging training?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Apr 16, 2015 10:56 am

"Learning the ropes"
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Apr 16, 2015 10:57 am

As the man said when his hanging was cancelled, "No noose is good news."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 20, 2015 11:09 am

What do you call a brassiere made of seaweed?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 20, 2015 11:46 am

Kelp help?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 20, 2015 11:48 am

Algae bra

Hahahahaha
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Aug 23, 2015 3:21 am

Why isn't feldspar more appreciated?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 27, 2015 3:53 pm

Why aren't there any restroom facilities at Machu Picchu?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 27, 2015 4:07 pm

I feel as though I need to go back to school for a couple of semesters to answer your riddles.

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 27, 2015 4:11 pm

C'mon, they're just dumb puns.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 27, 2015 4:25 pm

Well, either they're too dumb or I am.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Aug 27, 2015 6:51 pm

Hint: it's not you.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Aug 28, 2015 4:19 pm

Not even a stab at it?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Aug 28, 2015 4:29 pm

I honestly don't have a fucking clue. And I did try to figure them out.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Aug 28, 2015 4:40 pm

Q: Why isn't feldspar more appreciated?

A: Because everyone takes it for granite.


Q: Why aren't there any restroom facilities at Machu Picchu?

A: Because what's Mayan is urine.


See? I told you: dumb.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Sep 18, 2015 5:40 pm

What's the opposite of wrinkly?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Sep 21, 2015 2:42 pm

not wrinkly.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Sep 21, 2015 2:47 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Sep 21, 2015 3:01 pm

If you're wondering what that loud groaning noise was....
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Oct 08, 2015 6:18 am

Why did the pediatrician start taking law classes?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Oct 10, 2015 11:27 am

To study child labor laws? Or would that be an obstetrician?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Oct 10, 2015 11:30 am

I haven't worked out the punchline yet. It's something about "trying his patients."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Dec 17, 2015 10:02 am

Two more groaners, not yet fully worked out:

Q.  Peter The Great was raised by members of the convent on the grounds of the Royal Palace.  What was the name of his chief caregiver?


Q.  What do you call an auto repair business that works exclusively on Ford sub-compacts?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu Dec 17, 2015 10:34 am

NoCoPilot wrote:
Q.  Peter The Great was raised by members of the convent on the grounds of the Royal Palace.  What was the name of his chief caregiver?

The Royal Peter Raiser?



NoCoPilot wrote:
Q.  What do you call an auto repair business that works exclusively on Ford sub-compacts?

Bankrupt.
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Terrible Puns
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