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 Terrible Puns

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NoCoPilot

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Dec 10, 2016 5:56 pm

Why did the maid drive out to the coast?
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_Howard
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Dec 11, 2016 9:23 am

It was too far to walk.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Dec 11, 2016 2:05 pm

Qua? You didn't even try.

She went to the coast because she heard there were was an opening for a Light House Keeper.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Dec 11, 2016 4:48 pm

I tried. Really.
If you don't believe me, ask my wife; she says I am very trying.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Dec 19, 2016 11:32 am

My band got hired to play a couple of gigs... but we quit after 1800K.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Dec 25, 2016 3:27 pm

Livers and rakes.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Dec 31, 2016 11:24 pm

You know how Coca-Cola got its name by originally containing cocaine? Turns out there's another soft drink that used to contain drugs, in this case LSD.

It was called "Fanta-C."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Apr 17, 2017 2:37 pm

Huh. Turns out the "Ultimate Pen" is only the second best one out there.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Apr 17, 2017 3:29 pm

I see what you did there. Very clever.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Jun 05, 2017 4:58 am

I got so tired, being unable to tell my left sock from my right sock in the dark, that I bought a pair of socks that can be worn on either foot.

They're called "uni-sox."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Jun 12, 2017 11:00 am

Why is the French Riviera like the Marshall Islands after the atomic bomb test?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Jun 12, 2017 11:14 am

"Bikini atoll" has to be somewhere in your pun.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Jun 12, 2017 11:33 am

Put a "no" in front of it, and you got it.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Jun 16, 2017 4:02 pm

Why was Jimmy Fallon given "The Tonight Show" instead of "The Late Show"?



Because the network didn't want "Fa-Late-Show" to start trending.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Jul 16, 2017 8:08 pm

The guy who drives crazy, weaving in and out of traffic trying to get to the highway, could be said to have an arterial motive.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 08, 2017 5:39 pm

What do cannibals like to eat for dessert?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 08, 2017 5:42 pm

A cobbler?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 08, 2017 5:56 pm

Ladyfingers.

Or a cobbler.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 22, 2017 11:56 am

What do you get when you cross Bullwinkle with the devil?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 22, 2017 12:16 pm

Do you mean "deVil" (Cruella deVil)?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 22, 2017 12:31 pm

What do 101 dalmations have to do with Rocky & Bullwinkle?


Last edited by NoCoPilot on Tue Aug 22, 2017 1:50 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 22, 2017 1:22 pm

Cruella deVil is a character in both. Isn't she?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Aug 22, 2017 1:48 pm

No, you're thinking of Natasha Fatale, voiced by the recently-deceased June Foray.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Aug 28, 2017 12:39 pm

Why is red wine salty?

Because it's "mer l'eau."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Aug 28, 2017 1:36 pm

NoCoPilot wrote:
What do you get when you cross Bullwinkle with the devil?
Mooseifer
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Terrible Puns
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