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 Terrible Puns

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NoCoPilot

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Mar 13, 2016 1:19 pm

Mrs NoCo's favorite breakfast cereal is Kix -- when she can find it!
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_Howard
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Mar 13, 2016 2:49 pm

Has she looked on Route 66?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Mar 18, 2016 11:20 am

Every good gardener has a stable of hoes.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:33 am

There was a sprint at the local high school track meet.

One boy won, and 59 others tied for second. The race was over in sixty 2nds.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sun Apr 03, 2016 3:30 am

On the last day of charm school they teach the girls how to use their eyelashes to maximum effect. It's called batting practice.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Apr 05, 2016 3:00 pm

Digital-to-analog converters.

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Apr 05, 2016 6:45 pm

Digital Calculator


Last edited by NoCoPilot on Tue Apr 05, 2016 6:48 pm; edited 2 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Apr 05, 2016 6:46 pm

Huh?
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richard09

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Apr 05, 2016 9:52 pm

You need a picture of an abacus.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Wed Apr 13, 2016 8:41 pm

Wyoming? Well why not?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Apr 16, 2016 1:23 am

My piano keys are covered in scales.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Apr 16, 2016 7:06 pm

NoCoPilot wrote:
What do you call a vegan butcher shop?
http://www.mprnews.org/story/2016/01/23/vegan-butcher-shop
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NoCoPilot

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri May 13, 2016 11:26 am

Q: What do you call a camel with a head at each end?

A: No, not a Pushmi-pullyu.  A Palindromedary.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri May 13, 2016 11:28 am

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon May 23, 2016 6:43 pm

Joe's Tows:

Neon sign above the lot says "TowHere"

Sign at the customer desk says "ToWhere."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Thu May 26, 2016 10:00 am

A guy gets shipwrecked. When he wakes up, he's on a beach. The sand is dark red. The sky overhead is dark red. He gets up and notices that the island also has dark red grass, dark red birds and dark red fruit on the dark red trees.

"Oh no!!" he says, "I think I've been marooned on a desert island."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri May 27, 2016 1:33 pm

Q. What's the only thing worse than when it's raining cats and dogs?

A. Hailing taxis.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri May 27, 2016 1:48 pm

NoCoPilot wrote:
"I think I've been marooned on a desert island."

Or --- "I've been deserted on a maroon island."

Either way, major groan.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Jun 10, 2016 8:56 am

There was a papa mole, a momma mole, and a baby mole. They lived in a hole out in the country near a farmhouse. Papa mole poked his head out of the hole and said, "Mmmm, I smell sausage!" Momma mole poked her head outside the hole and said, "Mmmm, I smell pancakes!" Baby mole tried to stick his head outside but couldn't because of the two bigger moles. Baby mole said, "The only thing I smell is molasses."
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Fri Nov 18, 2016 10:17 pm

Why did the newly-sold robot go back to the factory?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Nov 19, 2016 8:01 am

Because it was recalled. It was a Samsung robot.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Sat Nov 19, 2016 9:15 am

No, because it was about to change hands.
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Mon Dec 05, 2016 4:54 pm

Whaddya call a song about cheese?
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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Dec 06, 2016 5:06 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Terrible Puns   Tue Dec 06, 2016 5:23 pm

Not bad -- but I was looking for "an homage to fromage."
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Terrible Puns
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